The ticket is booked, the diet's been had, the running appears to have had a dramatic effect (terrified children weeping and cowering as i thundered past was pretty dramatic ok?) and the dress for The Wedding Of The Century has been bought. And its a size smaller than i would have bought if i'd been shopping for it two months ago. Remind me to take back all those nasty mutterings I have spat into my bowl of fibrous sh*t-a-bix every morning. Granted it looks like i've been painted into it. Not like a Picasso with a nipple on my forehead and another three on my elbow. Painted into it in a good way.
All that remains is a Clifton tan (read 'quick Carribbean spray paint behind Cavendish followed by a wink and a nudge'), a french pedi and a decision on red wedges or black ones, and i'm good to go. Would somebody grab an airbrush and zip me up please, this Wrangler's going home. Almost.
um. okay, totally unrelated: but all your panties have slowly been falling off the line. How did you do that? it peplexes me? did you draw them yourself and then change them? or is it....magic?
ReplyDeleteQuestion, if the dress is that tight are you able to sit down or are you going to suffer in the name of beauty and have to stand through the entire wedding?
ReplyDeletebetenoir: so glad someone's noticed. it makes the effort worthwhile. it is, like, totally magic (with a little bit of daily design work chucked in).
ReplyDeleterevo: i shall either be dancing or flat on my back. problem? i think not.
The next question is: what's going to happen when they are all finally on the ground...a new load of laundry? or a whole new theme ?
ReplyDeletebetenoir: now see THAT would be telling...
ReplyDeleteFlat on your back in the middle of the dance floor..hahaha
ReplyDeletePlease post pics...(more)hahaha
Looks stunning! Good luck with the tan - remember to do your armpits...
ReplyDeleteBeware when the guys start talking about "We lost a lot of good men out there"
ReplyDeleteRemember to test if it unzips nice and quick too ;)
Lucky thing! I'm going back for my sis's wedding in three and a bit weeks, can't wait. I might have to pop into that Cavendish spray paint place too! Alternatively I'll try the buy-a-crate-of-cheap-beer-and-pass-out-on-the-beach tan.
ReplyDeleteDon't worry I've noticed the panties too. Very clever GW!
revo: in your filthy little dreams ;)
ReplyDeletephlippy: lol - now where've i read that?
chewsy: like a ziploc bag, honey, like a ziploc bag.
mark: einAAA. with our pommie lack-of-tans may i suggest you pay the money and get the carribbean! have the beer too. just have it under a brollie.