Burning Sensation.

British Sensationalism, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways for you shall I?

Holiday time in a certain British household. Mom and Pops pack up their thronging herd of blonde children plus all the usual crappy paraphernalia and head to the airport. They've had shots for every disease known to science, because honestly, you never know when you're going to get bitten by a rabid olive when you haul down your broeks for a quick squat on the side of the road. With the tail pipe sparking off the asphalt they're bound for Gatwick, leaving practically nothing behind. Sure the kitchen sink could cost them in overweight baggage but again, best to be prepared you know.

The holiday goes swimmingly until one night, when the folks, digging around in one of the suitcases, have a startling realisation.

Pops: Oh bugger. It would seem we have left our Common Sense behind.
Mom: Oh that is a shame. Oh well, lets leave our children sleeping, all alone, in an unlocked room, in a foreign country and go out for a spot of dinner.
Pops: Splendid idea! I might just put my finger in a wall socket whilst we're out too.

Hands up who can guess what happens next?

Splendid. You're right. 1 X missing child.

Cue instant Media Orgy - Sky News is practically having one massive on-screen orgasm, flashing BREAKING NEWS on a shitty yellow scroll banner (which doesn't really go with their whole red/blue theme they've got going, in my opinion) over and over again, splashing cute blonde-haired blue-eyed tennis gear pictures with an 'Aaaaah' factor to rival the f*cking puppy in the loo paper ad.
Emails start flying around the world with the tennis pic - Have You Seen This Little Girl? (A goat herder in a little village in Tibet swears he saw her clinging to the underside of a llama but he only checked his email on his blackberry a few days later and besides, it could have just been the mixture of shrooms and goats piss on an empty stomach).
Lakes of Tesco's shitty mixed-bunch flowers, candles and teddy bears spring up all over the place in true British style, websites are set up, Facebook groups are set up (get lives you sad sad people) "ordinary" people fly down to help in the search, appeals for money are made. MONEY i tell you. Because money can solve anything you know. I bet you its a fake site. Its the guy who wanted people to donate money so he could buy a Hummer but nobody fell for it.

What the hell is this all for people? SERIOUSLY. Is it because she's blonde? Is it because she's cute? Is it because those tennis shorts just tugged at the heart strings? Do you know how many fucking children in this world are abducted or go missing? In America alone 2 185 children are reported missing EVERY GODDAMN DAY! Children in Khayelitsha disappear at a frightening rate, getting gang raped again and again and left strung to trees, their broken bodies swarming in flies. Where's their f*cking media attention? Do you see the appeals? Do you see the thousands of Rands wasted on shallow floral bullsh*t lining the streets? I don't think so. So what makes this one little girl so special? My god people, its a f*cking tragedy, yes, but you know what? She ain't the only one.